Tuesday, December 02, 2003
Saturday Night Experience!
Sorry about the week of nothingness. Sometimes, I just get so wound up with other things that I forget all about writing them down. Anyway...

Saturday was a big day: It was my work friend's (Michelle) birthday. Unfortunately, I was working during the day, but I finished just before they met, so I was able to change and nip to the meeting place in time for 6.00pm. I met up with Susan and Nakisa first (I've mentioned them before: Susan is the girl I love (Although the feeling is not mutual.) and Nakisa is the girl I said "Rip It All To Shred's And Let It Go!" too. Not embarrassed about that anymore, I think she forgot. Phew!) and then we met the rest of them.

The first thing one of the guys said when he saw Michelle last night, which cracked us ALL up, was "Whoa! Do you have Road Tax for those breasts?!" Seriously, they were just... There. Biiig. She didn't exactly hide that fact either. Ah well.

Anyway, after all the exchange of presents from us, (I got her some bath stuff, because she really likes that kind of thing... Or so she said.) and hugs from her, we went down to a proper bar, where we sat for a bit, before heading to a Chinese restaurant. I'd never had Chinese, so I was a bit worried, but it turns out that we couldn't get in, so that solved that. Instead, we went to Dexter's Bar and Grill. We got in straight away, and bought drinks, etc. We were all talking happily, and I was chatting to Michelle's brother, when this bombshell landed.

"So, how long have you and Susan been going out?"

... Excuse me? What? Err... A bit of an "On the spot" question, and I just sat, staring at him for about 30 seconds, before saying "What? But we aren't going out!" He was surprised. I asked where he heard that from, and he just said "Well... You're always together." It was then that Susan heard it, and thought I'd been spreading rumors. Ack. I quickly sorted that out though.

The Meal:
The meal deserves special treatment, because as soon as I saw it on the menu, I knew I was going to order it. I believe it was the most expensive item, but I didn't care. A Rack Of Barbecue Ribs, With Chips And A Separate Dunking Of Barbecue Sauce. It was absolutely gorgeous. I was dunking my chips in that sauce. When I finished, I was dunking my fingers.

After the meal, we paid, and went to a place called The Exchange. Apparently, with it being a Saturday, you needed to be 21 or over, which meant half of us got ID'd. Bastards. No idea = No entry. (Not to mention the fact that me, Susan and Nakisa are actually under 18.)

So instead, we tried the same bar as before, but again, we got ID'd. This time, it was only 18, so we used our UCI Cast passes, and claimed we only took 18 or over. Suckers.

Anyway, we were telling jokes and stuff, then I got a text from my friend, who Michelle had seen before and called him cute, so I told him. I also told him about her "Big 'uns" because she did say "Put that in!" then changed her mind. Too late. She was climbing on me to try and get my phone before I finished, but I managed to get the message sent off fine. Oh so funny. Then, she stole my phone to play Snake II, and received the reply. My turn to climb on her to get it back before SHE wrote anything! I got it back fine.

That wasn't the last of the phone troubles though. Susan swiped my phone and text Victoria saying I liked her. She claimed it was 'Matchmaking' but I call it 'How The Hell Am I Going To Explain This'.

Anyway, a little later, I don't know how we ended up hugging, but we did, and she just said "Oh! Your warm!" and I replied "Your cold!" so I sat hugging her to warm her up. Nakisa just said "Any excuse to touch her." That ended that then. Blah.

The rest of the night was just telling jokes such as "What do you do if you see [Insert name of UCI employee who is sat next to you here] bleeding, and running away from you?" "Reload!" and also this one, which is HILARIOUS!


A man suspects his wife is having an affair, so he goes to get a talking parrot. When he gets to the pet shop, he asks for the most intelligent parrot available. The pet shop owner assures him that this is the best parrot in the world, but tells him that there is one drawback. He holds onto his perch with his penis. The man says that it's fine, and takes it home and sets it in his living room. He tells the parrot to dictate to him anything his wife does with other men. First day, he asks the parrot. No response. Second day he asks it again. Still nothing. Third day, there is still no news, but on the forth day, the parrot has something to say. "Well," says the parrot, "I saw her come in with a man, and they sat down and had a cup of tea." "And?" asks the man. "Then, they started hugging... And kissing." replies the parrot. "What happened then?" says the man furiously. "Dunno" said the parrot. "I got an erection and fell of my perch."


Anyway, afterwards, it was like 1.00am, so I decided to head off home. So did Susan and Nakisa who was getting a lift from her parents. On the way down to the Taxi Station/Car park, Susan admitted that Jon had sent her secret texts from across the table, asking her to get back with him, since he's blown it with all 3 of his girlfriends. I just instantly said "Don't do it." but Nakisa surprised me and said that he deserved a second chance. I got really angry at that. Second chance? What about all the guys who haven't had a first chance at all?! The ones who are honest and really sweet to girls? I told her that to her face, because that includes me. She couldn't answer me. No surprise. It didn't bother me enough to ruin the evening, but it was still a kick in the pants.

Anyway, at the Taxi rank, I was behind 2 girls who were kind of pissed, and they got in their taxi, when mine pulled up. The guy asked me where I was going, and I told him. He then ran and stopped the girls taxi, and said "Here, get in this one, they're going the same place!"

So, I had company on the way home. These girls were really friendly and stuff, so we were talking on the way home. When we got to their house (3 roads from mine.) they paid, despite my protests that I was going to pick up the bill, which left 3 roads worth of Taxi fare. 40 pence.

All in all, a great day. Also the latest I've ever stayed out with friends until. Hurrah for nerd-ness!

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